August 31, 2015

online dating tips

Online Dating Tips

Online dating is now the second-most common way couples meet, with 40 to 50 percent of singles trying out services, from sites to apps. So if you're single and wish to avoid spending all your time clicking aimlessly or going on dates you feel like running (screaming) from, you need to make a few changes.
  • look for compatible match dates -- Compatibility is an important factor that will save you time. Some people are attractive but not photogenic and photos will just not do them justice. Most of us are not professional writers, so personals will only give you a glimpse of who your date really is.
  • upload a nice photo of yourself -- Go out in the natural light of the day and take a nice photo of yourself, and by yourself we mean you alone. You don't want to show how attractive your friends are, do you? No matter how bad you think you look, there are plenty of people who like you just the way you are. Those are the one you should consider dating.
  • keep your personal ad short and to the point -- By short we don't mean "you'll find out more about me at our first date"; we meant to say go ahead and tell us something but just keep it under 100 words. Tell the right person why you are right for them.

Why is dating in the 21st century more nerve-wracking than ever?

Part of it is demographics. About half of Americans are single, so there should be lots of choices out there, right? Not necessarily. Single men outnumber single women in the western half of the U.S., and vice versa in the eastern half, where there are more single women. So anyone living in Los Angeles (where there are about 90,000 more single men than women) who is looking for a man has an advantage over someone living in New York (which has 200,000 more single women than men)
Dating anxiety could also have something to do with changing social norms -- you may not be sure what your role is in the dating sphere. People are living longer, gender roles are becoming more flexible, and adults are putting equal priority on their careers, friendships and social causes. Still, the pressure is on to date as much as possible, find a soul mate and get married. However, despite all this pressure and the unfavorable odds, dating can be a lot of fun with a compatible partner.
7 reasons to date online
When trying to determine whether or not online dating is the right path for you there are some main points to consider. These top ten reasons may help provide you with some of the positive aspects of online dating.
3 steps to perfect personals
Many people are finding out each day that getting on the best online dating sites isn’t the only key to finding the right people to date. Those who want to get the right message across and to meet new people need to make sure that they begin with the very best personals in order to get the right attention.
what do men look for in a woman?
and
what do women look for in a man?
In general, we tend to couple with people who have a similar level of attractiveness. We also find that men tend to fall for pretty faces, while women are highly attracted to men with fat wallets. From an evolutionary standpoint, this makes sense because men are looking to improve their gene pool while women are looking for men who will help to support their children.
things women do that drive men crazy
and
things you should never say to a woman
There are certain questions, phrases and demands you should never utter to a man or a woman.
Love is a conscious choice!
True, love is the ability to choose one person above all, and the ability to celebrate that choice for as long as you live.
Dating Safety tips - practical tips for dating
Better safe than sorry!

August 24, 2015

Practical Tips for Dating

Practical Tips for Dating Online and Off

There is no substitute for acting with caution when communicating with any stranger who wants to meet you. You are in control of your online dating experience at all times -- remain anonymous until you feel ready. Remember to always trust your instincts. If you feel unsafe or threatened, cease communication and report any misbehavior immediately.
  • Guard your identity. Don't share your full name, personal phone numbers, home address, place of work or any other identifying information while messaging until you have established a reasonable level of trust with the other party.
  • Get to know the other person online before meeting them offline.

Dating Safety Tips for Meeting Online

NEVER share your personal or financial information with people you don't know. Make sure to follow these guidelines at all times when meeting new people online:
  • Don't wire money to strangers or to someone who claims to be in an emergency (and wants to keep the request a secret).
  • Don't give out your credit card number or bank info.
  • Don't share your personal info, such as SSN, address, phone number, etc.
There are certain red flags to watch for that may indicate you're dealing with a scammer. Be aware of anyone who...
  • Vanishes mysteriously from the site, then reappears under a different name
  • Claims to be recently widowed
  • Asks for your address under the guise of sending flowers or gifts
  • Makes an unusually large amount of grammar and/or spelling errors
  • Asks you for money
At Single-and-Looking.com we care very much about our community and invest in fraud detection systems to protect you. However, even with these measures, we also need your help!

Dating Safety Tips for Meeting Offline

As of 2011, nearly 750,000 registered sex offenders were listed in the U.S. First meetings are exciting, however, always take precautions and use the following guidelines.
  • Always meet and stay in a public place. It is best not to go back to your date's home or bring them back to yours on the first date. If your date pressures you and you feel uncomfortable, end the date and leave at once.
  • Tell a friend. Inform a friend or family member of your plans, when and where you're going. Make sure you have your mobile phone with you.
  • Stay sober. Do not do anything that would impair your judgment and cause you to make a decision you could regret.
  • Do not get into a personal vehicle with someone you've never met.
  • Don't leave personal items unattended. You don't want to risk having personal information stolen.

August 17, 2015

Love is a conscious choice

Love is a conscious choice!

Our culture perpetuates unrealistic romantic expectations – and women, in particular, are predisposed to these expectations because from the time we're old enough to think, we dream that one day a Prince Charming will come along, fall in love with us, and we'll live happily ever after.
What's wrong with that picture?
Well, first of all, when we look to someone other than ourselves to be the source of our happiness or completion, that's a recipe for dysfunctional co-dependence, not true love. It trains us to hold off being happy until that perfect someone, soul mate or Mr. Right comes along.
A better strategy would be for you to be happy first -- whether you're in a relationship or not. And above all, love yourself first (i.e., hold yourself in high esteem) -- and you'll find no trouble finding men who will want to love you. After all, how can you expect someone to love you if you don't first love yourself?
Expecting love to be a happily-ever-after state of being, nothing could be further from the truth. Most of the time, the feeling of being "in love" dissipates from your relationship. When that happens, you become dissatisfied with your relationship, and you experience unnecessary pain and heartbreak as a result.
Perhaps one of the most important lessons you can ever learn about being, and staying, in love for life -- and for keeps -- is this: Never confuse the feeling of being "in love" with love. True love is a choice.
"Love is not just a feeling. It's a choice, a commitment, a way of behaving toward another. Love is not simply an event that happens to you. Rather, love is something you choose to do. The state of being in love is simply a prelude to love. But most people make the mistake of thinking they're one and the same thing. We are all given circumstances by which we can exercise the choice to love. That's the thunderbolt that God supplies. It's that instant attraction to another person, those warm, fuzzy feelings, that fever akin to drunkenness or madness that causes you to know that you're in love. But it's what you choose to do after that thunderbolt has passed that matters. You choose whether you're going to continue loving the other person after the drunkenness has dissipated, after the frills of romance have fallen away. You choose whether you're going to continue to seek the best interests of the other person, and care about him or her through any and all circumstances -- and for how long. Love is a conscious choice."
A successful relationship between a man and a woman is not born, but made. If you allow romantic love, or feelings, to become the basis for marriage and happiness, the foundation is likely to be unstable because you or your mate are likely to seek new emotional highs as time goes by. Feelings and emotions are fickle, and the circumstances that give rise to them, even more so.
After all, even if you're in the best relationship, there will always be days when you feel you love your mate -- other days you may not. Some days you could feel loved, and other days you don't. Even if you met someone who you imagine is your ideal mate, would they still love you five, ten, or twenty years down the road -- or would you still love them?
Love is an ongoing choice you make every day of your life. You wake up every morning and you say to yourself, "I choose to love this person today and every day of my life" -- their imperfections notwithstanding. And you rejoice in the knowledge that "I get to love this person" and expect to be loved the same way in return.
Love is a privilege, not an obligation.

August 10, 2015

things you should never say to a woman

things you should never say to a woman

Sports have unwritten rules. If an unwritten rule is broken, the offending player will face the consequences.
Relationships have unwritten rules. Technically, all of the rules in dating are unwritten, but there are certain rules in relationships that are so obvious they really shouldn't have to be explained.
Sadly, we're going to have to explain them, because some guys are just plain clueless.

"Are You Putting On Weight?"

Don't Say: “Are you putting on weight?”
This one barely needs explanation. If she's put on weight, chances are she's already well aware of that herself. The last thing she needs is for you to point it out.
Instead Say: “Let's do something active today. I'm feeling out of shape.”
If you do believe she's putting on weight, then your ultimate goal is for her to eat better and exercise. Instead of letting her know that you've noticed she's gone up a size or two (and trust us, she knows already), shift the focus to committing to being healthier together. You're not perfect and could probably stand to lose a couple pounds, too. The focus will then be on sharing healthy activities together, rather than on her weight gain.

"You Look Awful In That Outfit!"

Don't Say: “You look awful in that outfit.”
Instead Say: “I just don't like that outfit.”
If you must voice your displeasure in her appearance, it's best to blame the outfit and not the person underneath. If you don't like the way she looks in a dress, shirt or sweatshirt that graduated college with her, make it about the faults of the material. If you want to soften the blow, package the critique with a compliment so it doesn't sound like she's the unattractive piece of the puzzle. "I don't think that color works with your skin tone" or "That dress is making you look heavy in places that you're not" are at least softer ways of putting down her clothing choices.

"Was That Good For You?"

Don't Say: “Was that good for you?”
Almost as bad a question as "How many people have you been with sexually" is the query "How was that?" right after sex.
Instead Say: “That was amazing.”
If you want to know how you did, without asking bluntly, tell her how good she was in bed. She'll have to respond in some way.

"How Many Men Have You Been With?"

Don't Say: “How many men have you been with?”
Just as she should never ask how many women you've been with, you should never ask her how many men she's slept with. The reason you should never ask this question is because you don't want to know. It doesn't matter if the number is high or low -- there is nothing to be gained from the knowledge of how many other men she's been with sexually. The only thing it will do is change the way you feel about her. If it's too high, you'll think she just gives it up to any guy, and if it's too low you'll wonder if there is something wrong with her.
Instead Say: “How many long-term relationships have you been in?”
If you must know, or find yourself in a situation where you have to ask, it's better to steer the question away from sex and more towards relationships, stay away from the word sex, and focus on dating history.

August 3, 2015

things women do that drive men crazy

things women do that drive men crazy, in a bad way

Men love women. We do. We love making them laugh. We smile when they're happy and do our best to comfort them when they're not. Which probably goes a long way toward understanding how we put up with the crazy things they do.

She Poses Entrapping Questions

"Do I look fat in this?" "Is my friend Bella pretty?" We're all familiar with the questions, and the innocent way girls pose them, putting you between a rock and a hard place.

She Holds Grudges

Once you've made the mistake of giving a wrong answer to a loaded question, even if it was years ago, even if it was before you were dating, even if you've apologized or changed your mind, you better believe you haven't heard about it for the last time.

She Says "Fine"

Gentlemen, things are never "fine" when they say things are "fine." There is no single word that should cause you more fear and agitation, because when she says, "fine," what she really means is that things have reached world-ending, cataclysmic levels of bad and the fact that you don't know it only makes things worse.

She Expects You To Read Her Mind

Ladies want a man who is attentive and sensitive to their needs. Unfortunately, they often confuse being nice with being Nostradamus. No, girls, sadly we cannot tell when you're hungry or thirsty, and we most definitely can't guess where you'd like to eat or what movie you'd like to see -- at least without a little input.